Custody Evaluators

Their job performance is measured by their ability to find evidence of domestic violence.

Custody Evaluators. This is a special field of psychology and social work often performed by a person with a Masters or a Bachelors degree. It is investigative in nature. These evaluators are measured by their ability to find evidence of wrongdoing that can be used to break up a family. So, whose best interests do they serve?

I wane nostalgic about this paid position in Family Courts because I never had one on my case. I always wonder what it would have been like had some qualified individual come into my life and my children's lives and to have done a comprehensive survey on how the children have fared without their father. Ok. So this is where my fantasy breaks down.

People who are involved with family court are called in because they can fill an economic niche--sometimes fantasized by people like me--to make the family whole again, in spite of the divorce.

My recommendation is that, if you are looking for someone who will believe the truth of what happened during the divorce and dissolution of your family, you are not going to find anyone.

Custody Evaluators, like the rest of the lackeys dependent upon the family court for their income, will not find an absence of domestic violence, but will, rather, prove that domestic violence could exist. This is the way they make their bread and butter. They get compensation based upon how many cases in which they find DV to be a factor. In all likelihood, the DV that they will find will be dependent upon who made the charges first and how credible those charges are.

This is an important distinction. If, as a disaffected, abandoned husband had invoked domestic violence when my ex had kidnapped our children, the Virginia courts would have likely intervened on my behalf. Being an abandoned husband whose children had been kidnapped, and wanting neither the police or the courts to be involved said nothing, I became a victim of the he said/she said first phenomenon. In my case, she said first that I was abusive.

No custody evaluator will go back further than the first disaffected spouse who is willing to put their disaffection into writing. And no one is more likely to have their disaffection as well articulated as the kidnapping spouse. Not because they want to, but because the people at DV shelters around the country are equipped and trained to aggressively advocate for a woman who shows up with children.

Custody Evaluators who are called in after the first allegations have been made publicly are going to be nothing more than mouth pieces for the first allegator who is most likely to be the kidnapping and custodial parent.

Are these people authorized by statute to operate in your jurisdiction? Are there any minimum education requirements for these people? Do they undergoe regular therapeutic evaluations to make sure that they are capable of making decisions in the best interests of your children? Don't bet on it.