Elusive Innocence

Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused

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Dean Tong is a man who has lived through the worst possible case of false allegations and survived to tell his tale and the tale of several others. You will either be deeply riveted with the engaging suspense of each case as he unfolds each in multiple ways. OR, you will want to burn the book out of the pure fear evoked by the reality of the men's lives that were torn apart.

I found myself doing the first but wanting to do the second.

The book presents worst case scenarios of false allegations of sexual abuse of the children we know and love as our own--something that, scarily, happens nearly everyday in America. But the lessons learned--even in a case such as mine, in which I have been accused and convicted of being a bad parent--will be the knowledge of how bad it could have been. Now, in my future, I know what I need to be aware of.

Men who are accused of assault are assumed guilty as soon as the allegation is made. That is the way the laws in our country are written. It does not matter that the person making the allegations is a drug addict, pedophile enabler, or has a deep psychotic diagnosis. When an officer arrests you on suspicions of child sexual abuse, your life will change forever. For those of us that have been arrested for child abuse--in my case, I brought my kids to the wrong police station for the parental exchange--we will be forever branded.

This book does not focus on the children whose lives will be forever changed by the fathers who can no longer touch them, kiss their forehead, or give them a bear hug.

This book tells how to protect yourself from the other parent you know will go to every measure to make sure your life after divorce is hell.

"...many of the women who make false allegations have something pretty terrible to hide, a knowledge that they are not, in fact, fit to have custody of their children... The process of working through and disproving a false allegation of child sexual abuse is a long, draining, lonely process, and you will need ongoing support for those times of frustration, depression, and weariness. You will spend most of your time feeling (and often acting) defensive, fighting the unfair social stigma that says, "If he was accused, something must have happened." "

You will end up fighting your children (even when they don't want to fight) as much as you are fighting your ex. You will find yourself at odds with every lawyer, psychologist, social worker, and judge who fly the banner of the feminist ideology "Men=bad. Women=victims."

And, you will be introduced to the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and other equally corrosive psychological problems that may be the cause of the increase in fatherless children nationwide.

This is a truly frightening book, but it is one you cannot afford to miss.